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[quote=Anonymous]I'm a kind of shy person in a field with a lot of really shy people, so I've been on both sides of this conversation.  I think it is the socially kind and appropriate thing for more talkative people in a small group to work to include shyer people and help them loosen up.

For the OP, I would suggest thinking of some set questions you can ask people in advance:  are you traveling for the holidays? what were you up to this weekend?  Pay attention to the interests of your coworkers so that you have a go to topic:  kids, cats, hobbies, football.  I doesn't matter if you don't know anything about the subject.  If you have close friends or family that you feel more comfortable with, you might ask them if they will practice with you.  It might feel silly, but it can be really helpful to focus on the rhythms of conversation and the social cues that other people have mentioned.  For me, making small talk and trying to act outgoing can be really tiring, so I also choose the events I attend carefully.[/quote]

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