Reply to Anyone else think their raging, angry DH might be on the spectrum? How do you cope?

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Reply to "Anyone else think their raging, angry DH might be on the spectrum? How do you cope?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Yeah - I could have written this. My husband worsened as he got older. I’d listen to him speaking with others on the phone - so kind, charming, warm - nothing at all how he spoke to me in private. Was like had two sides.  I thought was Asperger’s - self absorbed, no empathy, has to know everything and always be right. I’m genuinely sorry you are caught in the middle, as have a young child. Asperger’s don’t/can’t change. I’d look at paths to a separation, heading toward divorce. Maybe living separately for awhile will give you both some breathing room and you’ll  be able to make decisions in your own best interest. [/quote]

Yup. I’m the one who emotes though. My husband stays really pleasant on the surface then the mask drops and the real demon comes out. Last night it was about my parents literally in the process of dying cross country, and then finding out my aunt probably has cancer. Sympathetic on the surface till I got noticeably weepy and told him that’s why I didn’t have the bandwidth to deal with our adult child’s pronoun issues with me right now. He got real dark and made it clear that my priority was the pronouns and not the impending loss of my folks, who I haven’t seen now for two years. I’m afraid to go because he will file for desertion if I go out there. No one sees this in him because he hides it well.[/quote]

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