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Reply to ""Kids are resilient!""

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[quote=Anonymous]Wow, I disagree completely with OP and most of the posters, evidently! Resilience does not mean unscathed. It means that you can go through the fire and not let it destroy it.

I do think kids are resilient. I think people are resilient, often far more than we know! It doesn't mean that we will never experience negative effects when something bad happens, it means that we will hurt, we will grieve, we will sorrow, but we will carry on. Not everybody, unfortunately, but most people. And, that resiliency, that ability to pick up the pieces somehow, even when the worst happens, that is resiliency and it starts in childhood, sometimes with small hurts, but sometimes with big hurts.

Kids are resilient does not mean that kids will never suffer any effects from something bad happening that they experience. It means that when kids DO experience bad things (as we all will), they will probably be ok.

My parents divorced and it was hard, and yeah, it built resiliency. My sister died as a child and it sucked and was terrible. My mom said she wanted to die. But instead she found the strength to keep on going, probably largely because of her other kids, and eventually she was mostly ok. Not every day and not in every moment, but mostly, yeah, she was ok. She was resilient enough to build a life beyond that. My parents died, and it was hard, but it built resiliency. I've lost 2 children at birth and I did not think I would ever smile again, but you know what? I'm mostly ok. It makes me sad and I still grieve but still I am here, surviving and having a mostly happy life. That is what resiliency is.

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