Reply to Destination Birthday Trip for Parent

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Reply to "Destination Birthday Trip for Parent - Do I Have to Go?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think that is great of her! You mom is getting old, she doesn't care if she ends up spending the amount for anything. The trip will happen. After last year, some older folks are thinking they could lose everything in a matter of minutes. It is possible that could be her last far away trip. You neve know when you are that old. 
If she doesn't do it then, who knows when she will be able to. The following year, in 2  years?? When you are a senior, you don't of anything further an a year or two.

In my opinion, you go and you bring the grandkids if she wants you to.  Many seniors like their grandkids with them. It's her way to enjoying the final years of life. Who knows how many more years they have. She may even help you pay, who knows. 
[/quote]

Please.

She’s 70. She could easily live another 20+ years.

OP, don’t light yourself on fire to keep others warm.

[/quote]

This. Op, if she actually cares about spending time with her grandkids, she would plan something that would be easy for them to attend.

That's great she wants to go. She doesn't get to force anyone else to come with her.[/quote]

Is there not a middle ground here?  The woman is excited to celebrate her milestone birthday, would love to have a lot of loved ones around, so she invited.  There is nothing at all objectionable about that.  She isn't forcing anybody to do anything, and nothing in OP's post said she was.

OP gets to decide what she wants to do for her family.  That includes weighing cost, potential enjoyment of the experience,  potential inconvenience downside of the experience, and YES also how much she wants to make her mother happy and celebrate with her.

The right answer depends on a lot of things specific to the people involved.  But nobody is in the wrong here.  And taking a trip that you would not plan on your own is not "lighting yourself on fire."  It is taking life as it comes, saying yes to opportunities, and doing things to make loved ones happy.

Of course it would also be fine for OP to graciously decline, say it isn't right for her family at this time.  (And hopefully also propose an alternate celebration later.)[/quote]

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