Reply to How to Make Friends with Likeminded Moms, esp. Working Moms

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[quote=Anonymous]So, my friends come from (1) people I'm still close with from high school, (2) my best friends from college, (3) my co-workers (all former co-workers at this point - my current job, like yours, does not allow for much fraternizing), (4) the moms in my neighborhood, and (5) the parents of the kids in my kids' classes at school (they go to private school so these moms are not necessarily my neighbors).

My suggestion to you would be to stop looking for the whole package in one place. Get back together with your college friends and seek to satisfy the intellectual parts of yourself with them since you don't share the same current family structure. Hang out with the moms of your kids' friends and let them get to know you better, and you them. Most people don't talk about deep stuff when they first meet someone. Also, do you have a partner? Where are they in all this? My husband and I will often have conversations about deep issues because we know each other so well and can really bare our souls and say how we feel, whereas with other people (not my closest friends, obviously), I am sometimes more guarded.

Finally, you say you do meet people that you think are promising and then it fizzles out. From my perspective, I make time for the people I want to spend time with. If I met someone who always wanted to have deep conversations and couldn't just hang out and chill, I wouldn't choose to be around that person very often, because it sounds kind of exhausting. My closest friends and I can talk about serious issues and light ones. We can debate issues like racism and then gossip about someone in the neighborhood. I think most people have limited time and so they want to spend their time around people who fulfill many of their needs, and I don't think most people need to have deep conversations every single day. That's just my two cents. [/quote]

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