Reply to What are the benefits of a retirement or assisted living community?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think someone in her early seventies who is in good health is not a good candidate for a continuing care community yet.  Although the advertising brochures show very youthful looking old people as residents, the reality often is that most of the residents are physically and/or mentally challenged.  A relative of mine moved into an independent living apt in a continuing care community as a very peppy 85 year old and still felt that many of the residents had given up on life.[/quote]

Not true. The one relative we had who did CC moved in in great shape-vibrant, social and healthy. She was I believe 69. Within a few years she needed a minor surgery and came out of anesthesia with dementia. It happens fast. One fall and breaking the hip or one seemingly minor surgery and the person goes from independent to needing major care. It is pure hell having to get the right supports when they are living on their own in say an apartment and haven't formed a trusting relationship with a hired caregiver or they have a trusted caregiver and that person informs you they do not provide the level of care your loved one now needs.

From experience I will tell you somehow major emergencies happen at the absolute worst time for the adult children and after you have taken off work and dealt with everything that needs to be done within 6 months you often have your own medical emergency prob ably from all the stress. From support groups, etc I have now met people who had strokes, heart attacks, were diagnosed with cancer, were diagnosed with lupus, etc all within 6 months to a year of dealing with a chaotic nightmare with an elderly parent who did not plan for aging care needs. I also know quite a few situations where the elderly parent lived to a much riper age than the adult child who was there for them. Consider yourself lucky if one day your parent calmly dies in his or her sleep. Too many times there is a decline that involves endless emergencies and/or a raging and abusive case of dementia. I will absolutely go into continued care when healthy and happy so i can make friends and have the right help and not do in my children due to my own selfishness. There are emergencies with CC too, but it's nothing like what you deal with when they are aging in place.[/quote]

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