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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]BTDT and skilled care all the way, presuming it's a high quality facility. Your sister can do so much for him by being a very present visitor and advocate for his care and comfort than she can by trying to take on the primary caregiving responsibilities herself. Even with in-home help, the burden will be much greater and the end result is likely to be harder for everyone but especially your father.

Sibling dynamics in these situations are so hard![/quote]

Thank you. Yes, this is all very difficult. It was very difficult with my mother. With both it is constant phone calls talking my sister off a ledge, calling nurses, being present on care plan calls, doctor consultations, calling to speak with them, you name it. All while juggling a child at home learning (elementary), a full-time job (in the office, not working at home) and a spouse who has elderly parents of his own that he is helping. It's exhausting. The place he is now is very, very good. And we have tried all of them in their small town (third one!). It's nice to know he is in good hands. Frequently when I call a nurse is in the room with him. He needs constant attention and becomes highly agitated, which I expect from someone with dementia. I know it's the disease, and not the person. It will be constant chaos when he comes home. It was when he was there and in relatively good health. [/quote]

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