Reply to strongly favored parent - how to break the cycle

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[quote=Anonymous]It's not enough to just leave the kids with him sometimes. You need to create a schedule where the kids spend time with him regularly. In our house, we take turns with bedtime -- one parent does the pre-bedtime stuff (cleaning up, pajamas, brushing teeth) and the other does actual bedtime (tucking in, story time). And then we switch. Every night. We might trade nights if one of us has plans out, so one parent will handle everything that night, but then the next night the other parent handles everything. The kids never get to pick.

And since I have the flexible work schedule and therefore do more of the weekday stuff (school drop off and pick up, and I'm with the PK kid in the afternoons 3 days a week), DH has a standing date with the kids every Saturday morning, 3-4 hours where it's just them together and I catch up on work, exercise, or just catch up on other things. Every week. No exceptions.

My kids still ask for me a lot, and definitely more than DH. But the preference simply isn't as pronounced because they are used to having their dad do things with and for them all the time. They don't view him as an occasional parent. He's a full, involved, every day parent. They might spend more time with me, but they spend regular, reliable time with him, and that's the difference.[/quote]

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