Reply to Is this fair? Or unnecessarily mean?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Yes, reasonable, though I think you should be understanding towards how it inconveniences DC2. His schedule is being dictated by his sibling, and it really might impact him -- a lot of teenagers really need the extra sleep or time to relax in the morning. So I would say "I know this is a bit unfair to you since you're day starts later. [b]But it doesn't make sense for us to spend an hour driving back and forth to school[/b], especially for kids who are mature enough to walk or bike many days. So tell us how we can make this easier for you on those days that you are going to school early and, within reason, we will try to accommodate it."

It could be something as simple as making sure you always have his preferred breakfast item in the house, or he gets the favored seat in the car, or something. But just acknowledging that this is a bit unfair to him and offering to compensate in some way will probably go a long way towards making him feel heard and listened to. Often it seems like kids are throwing a fit over nothing (it's 30 minutes, not a huge deal) but teenagers have a lot of insecurity about their place in the world. Making sure he understands he's valued in your family is really important developmentally. Especially in a case where he probably feels like he is being forced to sacrifice for his sibling (kids need to feel like they are individually seen and appreciated).[/quote]

I agree with OP’s husband, but they live .7 miles from the school. 10 round trips wouldn’t take an hour. [/quote]

But it would end up basically killing an hour of time. Remind kid 1 it's almost time to go, wait for them to grab stuff, in the car, drop off, drive back, wait 15 minutes and repeat. I wouldn't want my dh decreeing how I waste my time, but this would be too much of a waste of time for me.[/quote]

Yup. The time isn't in the driving, it's in the loading the car, navigating the drop off area, etc. The fact that it's such a short drive makes it extra annoying because you are already basically doing them a favor (they are capable of walking except for the leg injury, even if the weather is bad). I would never do this twice in one morning for two kids going to the same school. I'm a parent, not a personal chauffeur.[/quote]

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