Reply to Is it terrible if I don't invite my brother and his family for christmas

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You people sound like Scrooges! Christmas is a family time, not a quiet day to spend all alone! I understand your DH is tired of the mess, but alienating your brother and his family is a pretty high price to pay for a few hours of quiet.

But if you are hosting all the time, OP, you are being a doormat! You need to have a talk with your brother and ask him if he would trade off holidays with you, that way you are not always hosting, cooking, cleaning. If their house is too small, then you can go out to a restaurant in the city.

Don't fall into the trap of being catty or lying or tiptoeing around the truth. Be honest with your brother, and maybe you can work things out together. Maybe he's tired of all the together holidays and would like a little space, who knows? You won't know until you have an honest discussion with him. Fair is fair, but pushing away your family on an important holiday, especially if it is an established tradition, is wrong, and may have longer negative consequences for all of you.

BTW, the kids will grow up so fast, and they will be easier to manage and you will WANT to have them all around together. Someday you will look back on this time fondly, when your nest is empty, or when your kids hit the age when they really don't want to spend time with you any more. It will happen sooner than you think, so it's best to compromise with your brother (and your DH), so no one's feelings are hurt and everyone feels treated fairly. [/quote]agreed. [/quote]

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