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Reply to "When you and your spouse don't agree about ADHD medication"
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think he is sort of in denial and is hoping some of it goes away as he matures. [b]He also used to be in the pharmaceutical field and thinks the ADHD drugs are partly a money-making scheme[/b]. It's the strangest thing, because he is otherwise a very intelligent guy (has a PhD), but I just cannot get him to read articles and books on the subject (and believe me, I've tried), so he is just so uneducated on the disorder. It's very frustrating. That's why I'm thinking I need to get a professional to convince him. [/quote] HOLD the phone!! He is in a position of knowledge here and you want to second guess him and what he's learned in his field....even with a PhD? Not to be snarky here, but perhaps it is you that needs to back down. My husband was the one wanting to try medication with my kids, but he never spent a lick of time researching it. I, on the other hand, have spent the past 5 years researching ways to cure my children's disorders naturally and holistically. When we reached a stale-mate on the subject, I told him that as soon as he spent his first hundred hours researching the subject, we could have our first serious conversation in which his opinion would actually matter to me. Medication is not something to take lightly. You can't just rely on the doctors...they aren't going to tell you about any of the horror stories or nightmares associated with these drugs. They're going to tell you exactly what the drug companies have trained them to say. You need to research how these physicians get kickbacks from the drug companies, you need to research the studies behind the drugs, you need to go deeper than a doctor does because in the end, if something happens to your child, they have insurance to back them up and you are left with the pieces to pick up. And they have the listed known side effects listed such that you can't say you didn't know the risks. If, after you have become an expert on the drug that they want to put your child on, you still feel that it is in your child's best interest to medicate, then you should do so. But do it with complete confidence and knowledge so that when/if there are problems, you know exactly WHY they are happening. Anything else is, in my opinion, completely irresponsible.[/quote] OP here. Well, in our case, I am the one that has done all of the research and my husband has done zero. His area was not related to ADHD (not even close), and honestly, I think he uses this argument as an excuse, just because he feels our son is too young. I have not necessarily been looking at research by doctors or even talking to doctors or physicians about medication. In fact, at our last visit, his dev. pediatrician didn't even mention medication. The NIH stated in their report that he would likely benefit from medication but did not push it at all. They recommended some other accommodations, all of which we have tried or are trying. And yes, my research has included all types of studies and my reading has included all types of books, including ones like The Myth of the ADD Child, which makes some good points (but also confesses that medication is the right choice in certain situations). Regarding the long-term risks, well, any drug comes with risks, and i think you have to look at your circumstance and decide which is the greater risk. I personally would rather accept any potential small risk over my child failing out of school, having no friends, and possibly becoming depressed or worse. We are consulting his psychologist and OT, so we are getting input from others who know him. I would like to know what the anti-medicine crowd thinks is the answer when you have a moderate to extreme ADHD case and you've exhausted all other options. We have done therapy, OT, lots of physical activity, elimination diets, behavior plans, sensory tools. Are you suggesting you just let your otherwise bright, likable child flounder and not reach their potential? [/quote]
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