Reply to Is nanny confusing my baby or am I just looking for someone to blame my frustration on?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]What is “lots of tears?” We don’t have a nanny so everything is consistent but I still get as many as 15 minutes of crying at bedtime and often a few minutes of crying at naps (no “routine” except a little cuddle, dark and white noise and sleep sack). I would say she’s fully sleep trained though. She just “powers down” to borrow a phrase from a book. I also notice the bedtime crying is worse on days with a lot of excitement, so I think she’s just processing. It never goes longer than 15 minutes.

I would ask nanny to do whatever it is you want, very specifically. So for example rocking until drowsy, then pit down still awake, then as much as 15 minutes of crying? Whatever it is. Make sure there’s a clock in the room.

But honestly I don’t think it’s this specific or magical. I think some crying is just part of it. [/quote]

Thanks this is incredibly helpful. Yeah "lots of tears" is like 20-30 minutes w/ check ins some nights this past week. He's certainly got FOMO and will only go down without any fussing if he's just absolutely exhausted. I don't mind a little fussing as he winds down, but 20 minutes of actual on and off crying is hard to listen to, and makes me feel horrible. It's helpful to know some babies just need some time to decompress and they cry at bedtime sometimes - I feel like everyone talks about sleep training like they have 3 rough nights and then it's all rainbows and sunshine, so maybe I need to partially reframe my own expectations for our spirited dude.
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Oh for God's sake, your 6 month old does not have FOMO  :roll:

It's also not especially difficult for a 6 month old to go from playing to native without much transition in between. It sounds like you're not well read on normal infant development.

I'd never sleep train again, based on what I know now. But  with the child that I did sleep train it was often like you describe. Things would go well for a few weeks (maybe even a month!) Then baby would enter a developmental leap or hit a new milestone and we'd be back to square one. [/quote]

I've read a ton on normal infant sleep, yes, and weighed a bunch of what I read against what I read about sleep training. As I said in my post and previous follow-ups, I know babies go through many changes and phases and regressions and nothing is linear. It's actually not at all what I'm asking though. I'm wondering if inconsistency between caregivers is leading to more confusion for my baby and making it even harder on him.

And I'm not talking about a 20 minute routine. I'm talking about a diaper change, and a song while he is rocked for a minute or two and put in the crib calmly. I do think transitions are especially tough for some babies and routine helps with that. Mine included, as I see great success on the weekends when I'm responsible for him all day.[/quote]

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