Reply to Getting family to pick up after themselves without nagging and nitpicking

Forum Index » Off-Topic

Reply to "Getting family to pick up after themselves without nagging and nitpicking"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]OP, I have ADHD and this could be me except I was socialized as a woman (to "see mess"), so I've felt compelled to develop at least slightly better habits...

It's also my kid who pretty clearly does not have ADHD, probably because 1) she's a young kid and 2) I don't set the best example. (DH is weirdly not too bad about this despite also having ADHD and having a live-in nanny/housekeeper growing up who did everything for him.)

For people who have ADHD, if they don't see it, it doesn't exist. That is, either if it's literally out of sight, or if it hangs around long enough, it becomes invisible. (This is also a point in favor of having a nightly alarm for your phone and having everyone put things away for 5-10 minutes-- the less it has time to pile up, the more an errant item will be noticed.)

Whether or not ADHD is at play here, I think having visual cues and explicit buy-in would be helpful. Like I think it's great that you have baskets by the door, but if that's not working, would something else like that-- but not exactly that-- work?

Years ago, I read a book called "Organizing from the Inside Out." Basically she says... what IS working? Even if it's just one thing, like a client of hers was hopelessly disorganized but her belts were always in the right place. Then you figure out WHY that works (I think in that case the belt rack was really pretty and easy to take pride in) and try to replicate it.

Also I remember what I call the "Coat Rack Theory." Say you have a coat closet that is awkwardly across the front room so everyone just dumps their coats on the sofa near the front door. You can beat yourself/your family up for not walking 20 feet across the room, or... you can put up a coat rack by the door. Sure you "should" be able to walk across the room, but it's not happening, so see what else WILL work.

So, like-- you have baskets at the door. But is it possible they'd work better elsewhere? Like in the dining room or wherever the end of their "runway" is when they come in? Maybe not. Maybe none of this applies. But just things to think about. [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics