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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP again-- thanks for the input. An almost overwhelming consensus-- I didn't expect that.

What prompted this was that I have a friend/friend-of-a-friend (complicated) who's been annoying me for a whole host of reasons, so I'll say up front it may be a BEC situation. I admit it!

That said, she and her spouse have been considering buying their first place for about a year, but obviously interrupted by the pandemic, etc. I think they'll buy in the next 6 months.

She posts somewhat frequently about homes she's found in her Trulia searches, like, "Ooh, this one is nice, but the kitchen is small. Would you get this one (great location), or would the kitchen be a dealbreaker?" Or "I can see just where I'd put my home office in this one, but we'd have to add a carport because blah blah." Just noodling the way you do, but on Facebook, to her friends.

I didn't think much of it at first, but after a while, it started to grate on me, specifically because she grew up poor and then eventually barely MC, and about half of her friends have total HHIs between literally $0/nearly homeless and $60k, and most of the rest (me included) under $120k. Her spouse makes $$$$$$ now, and she made it clear eventually that her budget is $1.5-2mm+, so she shares houses in that range and sometimes higher.

I mentioned her posting to DH and he said, "Wait, no one I know does that at all." Like, regardless of budget. He said that's just not something people do. They might ask about neighborhoods and they will post once they've gotten a house, but they don't constantly crowdsource opinions on their Trulia searches. He just thought it was weird. (If it matters, most of his friends are women.)

So in his opinion, it's an odd behavior, period. When he said that, I realized I only knew one other person who did this-- in her case, she's moving to a low COL area, so that's not a factor, and she mostly, though not exclusively, just posts really weird houses she finds in her searches, for amusement.

It sounds like folks here are agreeing it's not common, and also that they'd be more discreet if they significantly outearned their friends.

I'm still considering why I didn't find the behavior itself odd at first, even thought it does seem to be uncommon. I guess I categorized it with, say, deciding on a wedding dress or a couch or something-- some people enjoy crowdsourcing those things, and many people enjoy helping their friends choose them. But I guess with houses, it is different?

FWIW, we also bought our first home in the past few years, and I am heavily on FB and didn't really share where we even put offers (had to make several in the competitive market). I never thought about why I didn't share the house hunt on FB... I did discuss it IRL, and I don't remember feeling it would be weird to post about it, or jinx things or anything. I just didn't, and I'm a big oversharer. Hm. [/quote]

Yeah that would grate on me too. She is probably insecure about her background and that influences what she shares, so it’s kind of understandable, but I definitely wouldn’t do it.

It probably didn’t bug you at first because I think it’s pretty common to post weird one-off stuff, and you kind of shrug your shoulders and move on. [/quote]

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