Reply to Christmas Family Drama— Multiple Choice Quiz!

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]So much to unpack here.

The obvious answer is A.  But that's not even scratching the surface of the issues.

First, nobody writes someone out of their life over a single incident/statement/insult if they otherwise loved and cherished that person.  My guess is that there is a long history of tension - whether you recognized it or acknowledged it or not - and whatever happened at the bachelorette party is just an excuse because she doesn't actually want to have a relationship with you too begin with.  You need to go waaaaay further back to figure out why she dislikes you so much.

(Speaking as someone who had an on-again-off-again relationship with my own sister for about 15 years.  She could apologize until the cows came home for any specific incident, but the bottom line is just that I hated dealing with her constant attitude and drama.  Whenever it got to be too much, I'd take a break for a few years, and she'd go around acting like the victim because I wouldn't accept her apology for the latest insult when in fact it was years of minor things building up. We only truly reconciled when she mellowed in her 40s.  I thank her husband for that, he does an amazing job of tempering down her drama.)

Second, you truly don't know her address?  Ok, that's even worse than sis and I were at our worst.  If she moved without somehow getting word to you, she clearly doesn't want a relationship.  It's time to stop forcing it.  Just give her the gift and let her move on.  If and when she's ready, you'll know.  But don't be petty and hold back a present that you told her is coming, that's just childish.  [/quote]

Did you ever talk to her though, did you ever tell her what your problem with her was or did you just expect her to change or know what the issue was.

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