Reply to Regrets not coming out to my mom when she was sick - ever wish you got closure before someone passed

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Reply to "Regrets not coming out to my mom when she was sick - ever wish you got closure before someone passed"

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[quote=Anonymous]Oh OP, I’m so sorry. I am certain your mom knew that you loved her, and your care for her in her final months was a gift. You are imagining that she was on the brink of a conversation with you about your sexuality, but you can’t know that for certain. Perhaps the way you handled things was a mercy; some conflicts can never be resolved, and the best we can do is give and receive love to each other, which you did.

I totally understand your instinct not to create conflict or strain at such a vulnerable time when loss was imminent. Your mom knew you were gay and she loved you, and she sought you ought for comfort and care while she was dying. My belief is that your sexuality didn’t need to be discussed outright - you both were aware of your complicated history as you dropped everything to care for her, and she allowed you to do so. Those actions say everything you will ever need to know about your relationship.

Words can complicate and muddy things, and perhaps it would be even harder for you now if you had spoken about your sexuality. I think you handheld things beautifully. There is no “perfect” in these situations. You just do the best you can.[/quote]

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