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[quote=Anonymous]Absolutely. With my kids:

During freshman year of HS, I sit them down and explain that we can pay in state VA  college, no debt for them.  But, if they want to go OOS, they will probably need to get some merit based aid.  So, work hard in school.

Junior year, before we start the college search, I literally review their UGTMA and 504 accounts with them. Show them how much we put in each month (about $1500/kid, we started late). And show them the projection for what they will have if we keep contributing at that rate through college.  Divide by 4 and give them the number we can pay for college (for DS 1, it was $50k/ year).   They can take out Stanford’s only ($5500 a year). Beyond that, no student loans.

Then, as we college search, we look at whether it is possible to get the college into our financial limits,  because it is state, or the range of merit looks possible. If it’s an Ivy or NEASEAC or other no merit schools, then it doesn’t make the list.  Because we just can’t afford it.

Once all college decisions are in, we make an excel sheet showing net cost per school; whether it exceeds what we can pay with only Stanford’s, or what is left for grad school, a down payment, etc.

When it’s time to pay tuition, I sit down  with my kid every semester and transfer the tuition into his bank account.  And then I sit there and make him pay his tuition.

I feel strongly that kids need to know how to make business decisions and weigh finances as part of a serious decision. And that it’s cruel to let your kid get attached to a “dream school” get in, and them say no or saddle them and you with huge loans you wouldn’t normally take out, but feel like you must. Because, dream school.

I think that actually transferring over $20,000 of “his” money over to the school each semester makes my kid take college more seriously.

BTW— I went to Wake Forest. On a full academic scholarship.  These have become almost impossible to get.  I think something like 4% of kids without need get some merit. And several of those scholarships are devoted to URMs or NC residents. It’s a great school. But it’s expensive AF, and I would not count on merit aid. [/quote]

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