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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP,

Wait until your daughter is 12. She could start acting out too. Will you call her a little shit? I don't think so! What's really going on here? This is how 12 year old's can act. Maybe something's up. Children act out for a reason. Is school causing stress? How often does he go back and forth between homes? Why did you ask him to kill the bug? (Was it really six inches? Or three?) 
Maybe you should try not to react so strongly to him. Take a chill pill. Read the book, Yes, Your Teen Is Crazy. You would NOT believe what my son acted like when he was 13 and 14. You ain't seen nothing yet![/quote]

OP here again. That's really good advice. I don't know if anything in particular is up. I'm sure school is more stressful. It's the start of middle school and there are a lot higher expectations. He alternates homes weekly. I know his mom is dealing with a lot of the same attitude issues, but I don't know any of the details. (nor does his dad) We generally have a good relationship. But, I have been holding back a lot of frustration because I don't feel like its my place to be the heavy. I'm finding it difficult to navigate the fact that I don't want to be reprimanding or doling out pushiments, yet I feel the upshot of that is I'm just "taking" a lot of behavior that I feel he should be called out on. So I definitely "snapped" at that moment.

It may not make a difference at all, but I wanted to point out that I didn't call him a s+++, I said "don't act like a s+++" Like I said, I immediately went and apologzed and made a point of telling him that I thought he was a good kid and a good person, but that that had been awful behavior. And that I had totally overreacted and had not reacted well, but I was reacting to what he did not who he was. [/quote]

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