Reply to My 7 year old cries over everything! Help?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]why does it bother you when she cries? if you're worried she'll be teased, let it happen and let her decide if she wants to stop. crying on its own is not a bad thing. if it's keeping her from actually doing what she needs to do, then that--not the crying--is the issue.

how do you say no to her or give directions? does she have enough of a routine? does she get enough of a warning to transition activities?[/quote]

It worries me that she will be teased. Since there is basically no school, the kids on our street are her only social outlet and I don’t want them to tease or shun her.

Her routine is not so great right now because DH and I both work FT. Im home every day and he’s home a few days a week. She has some virtual camps in the morning and then she has to entertain herself. She has lots of specific things she can do (art, etc) but does get a ton of screen time because we have to do our jobs.

Usually we just say “no” to her. She tends to try and control most situations so “no” is what she needs to hear because otherwise she tries to negotiate and that leads to a meltdown.  I try to not say “no” over things that are inconsequential so it’s not like she hears no a ton of times each day. For directions I’m pretty well, direct.  “Please sit down for dinner” etc.  I’m polite but am clear that she is not being asked to do something. I don’t ask when I know that she can’t answer “no”. So we don’t do “do you want to brush your teeth?” We do “it’s time to get ready for bed, please go brush your teeth”.

She has a really hard time with transitions and I feel helpless for how to deal with it. She can tell time and I give her countdowns. “Bedtime in 30 mins” 20 mins, etc. I try to break things down into small chunks and put them in order that they need to be done. [/quote]

Summer has been rough, period.  No structure, limited activities, limited travel.

Hopefully the structure and accountability of school, albeit on a screen around here, will alleviate the boredom, long days and acting out.[/quote]

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