Reply to If you were a stepparent who divorced, did you feel used by your spouse and stepkid(s)?

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Reply to "If you were a stepparent who divorced, did you feel used by your spouse and stepkid(s)?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Honest question as I’m talking a friend out of marrying a dad with two snotty teens. I can only imagine them pushing her financial boundaries and getting her to do the majority of the housework based on what she’s shared with me. It seems one-sided and I don’t see what benefits there are for the stepparent so why bother investing so much beyond a cordial relationship and spending only yourself and your partner?[/quote]

I am a step-parent, although my situation was different because the kids were younger when I married their father. In some ways that was easier, but in other ways it was not. Being a stepmother requires patience, sacrifice, and selflessness.  In truth, I sacrificed a great deal personally for my step-kids in ways that they will never understand. But I didn't do it to get anything in return, so I haven't been "used." I loved them, and as an adult, I did right by them because I loved their father, they are children, and it was the right thing to do. I didn't do it for any "benefits" or recognition, and in truth, I probably never got the recognition I deserve for the sacrifices I made. Even though the kids love me, their mother is still much more important to them, and that's ok. I followed my heart and acted with kindness, so what I got was the ability look at myself in the mirror knowing that I'm a good person who played an important role in their lives. [/quote]

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