Reply to I’m considering hospice care for an elderly parent in declining health. Any advice?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My relative was in hospice in Maryland.  We were grateful for the help they provided.  They were monitoring the pain medication and regularly visiting our relative at the facility to ensure she was comfortable.

The thing is, the last few months I was going to the facility daily and checking on her pain patch.  Some days I went twice daily.  I tried to time my visits with the time the pain patches were replaced.  I had gone to visit her one time when she was in severe pain because somehow, the new pain patch had gone missing, and the facility said they could not provide a replacement because of legal restrictions.  Some random woman had begun visiting my relative.  She gave a song and dance on how she knew my relative, but I was suspicious. That was neither here nor there, but the fact that one pain patch went missing was enough for me to go paranoid.  I discussed blocking this woman from visiting my relative with the facility.  However, we all agreed that her visits were enjoyed by my relative, so I opted to monitor relative's level of comfort very closely.

When hospice entered the picture, they were in a position to ensure she had pain medication available at all times, even if a pain patch "went missing."  I don't think that happened beyond the one incident.  Hospice monitoring gave me huge relief, although I continued the close monitoring, as the end was getting near.  My poor relative no longer had much of any interest in anything.  I realize the pain medication might have shortened her life somewhat, but what's the point of enduring pain that will not end in this lifetime?  Hospice was a godsend in her case.  I wish we had signed up for it sooner, while we could have moved her to the beautiful hospice facility before it was too late, where she would have had sunshine spilling over her bed every day, with beautiful views outside.

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Interesting.  My friend also encountered the "missing pain patch" situation with her mother under hospice in a Florida nursing home.[/quote]

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