Reply to How to handle - DS being made fun of for not being good at sports

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[quote=Anonymous]NP here.  I'm writing to say, it does get better! Unfortunately it could get worse before it gets better though, depending on the peer group.

My son is 17 and went through a similar dynamic for years.

What helped:

***Finding new cohorts of friends / expanding his social world.***  As an adult with a car and a bank account, you may have to do some social engineering to make this happen "organically" in a way a 5 yr old can't.  ie, drive him to XYZ boy scouts/church group/art lesson in a distant neighborhood where the people are nicer.

—> Find groups that don't involve sports

*** Starting now, develop the hell out of any other skill-based passion he has, so he sees himself as very competent.  This is important to boost self confidence.  Art, complex lego kits, cooking, musical instruments, etc.

*** minimize the "sports nut" craziness that he's exposed to in your own home.***   [In our case, Dad is a big pro sports fan who highly values professional athletic ability and is a decent recreational athlete.]   Do you -really- need season tix to the Nats?  Why are you sitting down as a family to watch random hockey games on TV?

*** As your son matures and can handle frank conversations, be honest about innate ability and its limitations.  I was never going to be an Olympic gymnast because I'm a 5'10" female.  Not everyone is born with the potential to be Steven Hawking.  Try your best, but understand that ceilings do exist.

THIS POINT IS CONTROVERSIAL but here it is:

I didn't shy away from telling my son from an early age that some people are a$$hole$.   It's not you, it's him.  And I didn't use touchy feely, equivocating language to describe the little kid's motivations.

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