Reply to Resentment and care for the elderly in-law

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You need to take care of elderly relatives. Period. Otherwise what is the point of you having a family yourself?

Maybe you can move the relative in with you for now, and everyone can help.[/quote]

Where is it stated that people need to take care of elderly relatives? We didn’t choose to be born. However, our parents chose to bring us into existence. But that doesn’t mean we are beholden to them in their later years.[/quote]

I'[b]m not saying this to be snarky, but there is really something wrong here. This is a very strange, cut throat attitude that is divorced from emotion and love, and not normal. Normal people don't think or feel this way. If you love someone, you can't just let yourself off the hook by saying "Not my problem." If you love someone, then you have an emotional tie to them and an emotional obligation when they are in need that you can't rationalize your way out of. Normal people don't have to analyze whether or not they are "beholden" to their parents and why or why not. Most normal people understand on a gut level that they are.[/b]

I guess your parents really did a number on you. I'm sorry, PP. But that doesn't mean your argument is valid for most people.[/quote]

This is a lot of manipulative BS. You have a right to set boundaries and hire help. Normal and healthy people do not do in their marriages and their mental health for irrational elderly people. No elderly person wants hired help, but most adjust gradually. It's really not their choice.

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