Reply to Middle of divorce and job loss

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]If we agree that separation date was after he received the RSUs - they are marital property. It doesn’t matter when they vest/have vested.

ion  my stbx can’t be reasonable except for short periods of time and I still need to tread lightly.

He thinks I have no “moral right” to his stock or pension. This is just not true by law. 
But that’s not what matters now.
If I don’t go to war with him, I might be able to negotiate being on his insurance for a while, plus maybe get some money for the child once he sells stock (maybe!)
If I put my foot down and demand everything divided as per the law, I risk setting him off.
When I was employed I could afford getting legal advice and all. Now it might be cheaper and easier to just let him have “his” 401k and RSUs and ask for a little extra monthly... but remain amicable and maybe he could help me out in the future. 
That’s what I am trying to decide. [/quote]
You are not going to agree on the date of separation to be after he was granted the RSUs. Think logically.

At this point let go of the discussion on his retirement. You are entitled to half that he earned when married, NOT half of what he has. Remember right now his retirement account is circling the drain. You need to wait for the market to bounce back. This buys you time since you don’t have the money to spend on a lawyer right now.

For insurance, get the child on your exes plan. You do not go on the plan. Continue your COBRA. If he’s vindictive you don’t want to be at his mercy to him dropping your coverage on a whim.

For now your #1 priority is getting a job. Focus on that. Bide you’re time on the financial settlement.[/quote]

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