Reply to Losing my mind during daily check-ins with parent

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Stop calling so much. If you are getting resentful and she is getting worked up your calls are causing more harm than good. Call less and just be positive. Try to change the subject. If she can't, give her 5 minutes of obsessing and then politely make an excuse to get off the phone. Otherwise you are enabling her to be miserable.[/quote]

This x 1,000.

It’s not working because there is nothing to talk about. Your mom is an adult and, as far as you know, can find ways to care for herself and fill her time. Come up with a plan so she can let you know easily if she’s doing poorly. Twice-daily check-ins are a recipe for crazy making.

When you do talk, have something to talk about. Share a favorite new recipe. Email or text her a funny video or a beautiful photograph. Have a game that you can play long distance —it could be online, a voice-only thing, or by video conference. Collaborate together to write letters to relatives. We’re all burnt out on the news, so find creative ways to get away from it.
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