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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Man here, my wife says the same thing about me, although not so much the disrespect part but more that I don't listen and don't understand her on a deep level.  That I am too superficial and wouldn't care if she left.  It's heartbreaking to hear, it's not true of course but it puts a huge hole in our relationship and our intimate life is horrible and has been for years.  I check a lot of boxes on paper for sure, but if she doesn't feel loved it's hard to turn that around.

My recommendation is to try therapy before it's too late which it probably is for us although we are trying to stay together for the kids.[/quote]

One other thought - someone wrote a very good reply in another thread about blaming a spouse for being unhappy.  Could that be your situation?  My wife is very unhappy where she is professionally and doesn't have a lot of friends and I do think she takes her position out on me.[/quote]

Is it your fault that she is unhappy professionally and doesn’t have a lot of friends?

If she is a trailing spouse and moved away from friends and a job, or if you are extremely demanding of her time and energy leaving her with very few resources to put into her job and her friends, then you SHOULD be a little more empathetic and helpful in terms of working with her to find solutions.

Even if this isn’t your fault, why don’t you care that your wife is unhappy?  I am not saying that it is your job to fix it, but it just seems bizarre to me to not care at all about the interior life of the person you are spending your life with.  [/quote]

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