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[quote=Anonymous]OP, I sympathize. My parents split after 33 years of marriage and my dad successfully screwed my mom over financially. He was a career military officer, and she was never able to work because we moved so often, and through some serious BS moves he was able to shelter a much larger proportion of his pension than he should have. He had always been a narcissist and an alcoholic and a certifiable far-right conspiracy theorist but was so awful during the divorce process he managed to alienate all three of his children (and has never met any of his grandchildren). Some of his behavior....in one memorable letter he detailed my mother's sexual inadequacies to justify him leaving her. I mean, I'm glad they got divorced but he went scorched-earth and didn't seem to care that he was breaking his parental relationship as well as his marriage.

I don't think you're going to be able to stay neutral given your father's past behavior. You would be well-served to find an extremely good divorce attorney and to help pay for that person if you have to. I think you need to get that legal settlement in place ASAP.[/quote]

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