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[quote=Anonymous]OP, I’m just curious, will your child have a way to connect to his or her genetic ancestors?  I know you will be his gestational mother as well has the mother who raises him, so it’s different than adoption, but just as you have some mixed feelings about your child not having a genetic connection with you, I wonder if you’ve also considers that he or she may one day want to know his or her blood relatives from the egg donor.  I have been struck, after connecting with a generic half sister, by how profound and deep a connection I feel with her and her children.  Which doesn’t at all erase or diminish her love with her family, too; I just have been floored by the intensity of our connection even though we were strangers.  This is not at all a criticism of DE; I think ART is wonderful.  I also think that DNA testing is going to keep open a connection to genetic families that was not really conceivable 20 years ago and wondered, completely curiously, how you feel about it.

Also, I’ll just say that I felt a lot of ambivalence dur g pregnancy for totally different reasons, as my marriage was and still is pretty awful, and while I was overjoyed to be unexpectedly pregnant at a very advanced age, I was also really really unsure about bringing a person into the world under those circumstances.  I think ambivalence is really normal and responsible during pregnancy in general.  Life is complicated.  Our country and planet are teetering I a terrible abyss.  Second and third and zillion years thoughts are okay.  You can still be a great mom and have great joy in motherhood even if you carry ambivalence always.  My son is my greatest joy, my greatest love, my favorite person, and I am infinitely lucky to have him.  Even so, I am still sometimes ambivalent about having brought him into a world with an unstable marriage, a father who is morally unsound, and a world with so much darkness.  I think it’s okay to be ambivalent.  You are not a bad mom or a bad person if it never completely goes away, but you can still have happiness and be a great mother.  I’m really happy for you and wish you all the best.[/quote]

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