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[quote=Anonymous]I can speak to this from some personal experience-- my parents adopted an older child (8) when I was in my early 20s. So, there is a BIG gap between us, but there are also other siblings in between who are closer to her age. (I am the oldest.)  I love my sister, but I have to say that I don't think she ever grew to think of me and my siblings as her "brothers and sisters"-- I think she sees us more as cousins.  When she was pulled from her home, they separated the four siblings into three homes. She definitely still thinks of her biological brothers and sisters as her immediate family.  My parents recognized this and the three sets of adoptive parents still get the kids together at least a few times a year.  I feel badly for my sister because I can tell that she really misses her biological siblings, especially her little sister. Sometimes I do think that has stopped her from totally bonding with our family-- you can tell that she feels conflicted loyalties sometimes. So that is one consideration with older kids. With that said, my sister is still really happy to be with our family especially after spending three years bouncing around to different foster homes. I really feel for foster kids-- they have it tough. If we ever adopt, I would definitely look state-side for that reason.  There are so many kids here who need a permanent home. [/quote]

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