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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Recently found out about spouse’s affair.  Still trying to get the whole truth out, but let’s leave that part alone for now.  What I need help with is finding a therapist for myself who has experience working with betrayed spouses.  And I need help finding a divorce lawyer for an initial consultation.  I’m in Montgomery county and work in DC - would go to therapist/lawyer in either location.  Any suggestions or advice on how and where to look?

Thanks![/quote]

For attorney I would highly recommend Howard Soypher in Bethesda.  He is excellent.    301.298.4801.     Please, please, please go see him.   If you decide to divorce, use him.  If you decide to reconcile, use him to draft a post-nuptial agreement.  If your spouse will really never cheat again, she will have no problem signing it.   Please do this.   I caught my husband cheating, we went to therapy and after a year I thought our marriage was better then ever only to find out 10 years later, he never stopped cheating.  Therapy made him better at hiding it.  How I wish I had gotten a post nuptual.  Would have saved a lot of agony and money in the divorce.     In terms of a therapist, chose carefully.  If the therapist frames the cheating as being your fault in any way shape or form, run like hell.    You may have contributed to a lot of dysfunction in your marriage but you were in no way responsible for the choice your spouse made to lead a double life.    Check out this blog, it will save your sanity:  chumplady.com   esp about "still trying to get the whole truth".  That's a game you don't want to play and will never, ever win.         Sorry you are going through all this.      [/quote]

I don’t know this attorney but ITA with the rest. No marriage counseling - individual only. Post-nup favorable to you. He tells you the whole truth and answers any Qs you have and provides complete transparency on all devices at all times. Chumplady.

Be prepared to walk if he continues provides anything less than full transparency, honesty and remorse immediately.

You have a life.  Don’t waste any time on him if he can’t take responsibility.[/quote]

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