Reply to N-mother Inviting Self for Thanksgiving

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP again, I absolutely don’t want her here but she is the kind to just make the arrangements and show up, because it’s not like we will just let her stand outside the house knocking for hours. It also puts our sons in a bad position because they aren’t really the ones with a beef so of course they would want the holiday to be nice so why wouldn’t mom and dad just let her in? UGH.[/quote]

Then you need to be very clear that she will not be allowed in, and if she trespasses, you will call the police. [/quote]

Of course OP can’t do that. She already said that’s not what her kids would want. This would be far worse than letting her in.

OP sounds like you either have to convince her not to come or you need to suck it up. [/quote]

OMG this is ridiculous. OP does not need to convince her mother of anything. Narcissists are beyond convincing. That’s why they are narcissists. OP can make it clear exactly once to her mother that she is not invited and will not be allowed in. Beyond that, yes, the police need to be called. It doesn’t matter that this isn’t what the kids want. They are kids, they don’t have the context or life experiences to make these kind of decisions. In fact, especially if the kids are girls, they need to see that no means no and there will be no compromises on that. [/quote]

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