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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You should read a little about object relations theory, OP.  There were several people who became very interested in this exact question following WWII.   Following the war, many children were institutionalized and grew up with their physical needs met, but did not have a primary caregiver.  Many did not develop the ability to attach or connect to others, and many other children died.  
There were several theories proposed at the time as to why, and these are still the theories we use today to help explain the importance of infant attachment.  And it isn’t just about the smell or about being fed.  You might remember Harlow’s monkeys.  There is something else about providing caregiving and nurturing that is important to babies and toddlers.

- an actual scientist
[/quote]

+1 from another scientist. Those poor baby monkeys with their wire “mothers.” :-(
I used to tell my infant, “you are smiling at me to increase my oxytocin levels so I’ll want to keep taking care of you.”  In a baby-friendly voice, of course. 
I do know a couple of families, though, where the traditional mother/father roles are switched. I don’t mean regarding who WOHM. The father is the nurturing one, the “default parent” doing most things for the kids, the one the kids seek for comfort. The mom is more like a stereotypical “fun dad.”[/quote]

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