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[quote=Anonymous]I left an abusive marriage.  I started dating right away, because I was scared, alone and codependent at that point.  I hadn't been touched much my entire marriage.  That was a big mistake, because I didn't know who I was anymore or what a good relationship looked like.  I dated a lot of jerks and put myself in a lot of bad positions.  But the experience from it helped me understand why I picked a wrong partner to begin with.

That only came with therapy.  I have a clearer picture now of who I am, how I ended up with a jerk and that I didn't have good boundaries at all to begin with.  I also am learning to stand on my own two feet again for the first time in almost a decade.

My divorce was awful, I couldn't move on until it was done.  It was $130k and I was fighting for my life.  I married a maglinant narcissist.

What I think you should focus on to take away some of that yearning to start something new is to try some activities you never thought you'd try or always wanted to try.  Rock climbing, yoga, join a sport league.  Enrich your life and forget about dating until you're out of the weeds here.  Make your life a life you really want to live without anyone else first.  And do that now, you don't have to wait until you decide to divorce.

Good luck, OP![/quote]

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