Reply to Balancing travel to visit grandparents vs grandparents visiting you

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[quote=Anonymous]We have a 2:3 that moved to 1:1 visit ratio with age for my parents and a highly skewed version with MIL. I would ask them straight up what the issues is. Is it financial? Are they having mobility issues? Are they afraid of imposing and having you resent them?

That said, if you are putting in all the work and don't feel like they actually want to spend time together, and talking doesn't resolve, then don't. Video chat or something instead if you want. If someone wants something to happen, they'll make it happen.

Some grandparents also feel like they have to visit, stay involved, or otherwise revolve their lives around their grandkids when for whatever reason they don't actually want to or don't like them (or their own child).

Some use visits as a power trip and enjoy parading them around town to show off how many they have and "accidentally" bump into people they know and are trying to impress. Not being able to do this in faraway places means they don't want to visit. 
My MIL's sister does this and MIL tries to copy now that she has grandchildren. We had a chat about children not being accessories but finally, we just cut down on visits since we know she otherwise is totally uninterested in the children and is unwilling to visit us otherwise.[/quote]

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