Reply to 11 year old Son wants to be a Girl

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, I hear you on this question about whether or not it's trendy or a fad.  My 12 yo step-daughter has announced that she's transgender and refers to herself by a male name on her social media account. (ftr, I don't think she should be allowed on social media, but it's not my decision)  However, in person, she hasn't asked that we call her by different pronouns or the male name.  She dresses basically the same with the only exception that she instead of a bob hair style, it's an edgier shaved style which I would classify as androgynous.

Here's my thought on this: kids at this age are exploring their identities and these days, they have a lot more ways to explore than we did -- it's more than just the Breakfast Club stereotypes -- and it's more acceptable to explore a core aspect of your life (gender) than it would have been 20+ years ago.  I think that for kids in their tweens and early teens, it's can be a fluid experience and one that may not be permanent.  I'm not sure that my step-daughter understands that many people around her see being transgender as a final "decision". (I understand that for many it's not a decision, but just trying to express how others may view the announcement of being transgender).  It wouldn't surprise me in the least if a year or two from now, SD feels that she is non-binary or feminine once again.  I think she's looking for her place in this world and for whatever reason, the skin she is in now doesn't feel true to herself.

Like you, we follow her lead and support her in whatever way she chooses to express herself.  I think the only other conversation I would have with your child is that not everyone will as accepting as you will and perhaps role play with her ways to handle bullies and negative comments.  
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It sounds like your situation is rather different from OP’s. I think following their lead is the best choice in both situations, so kudos to you all for that. [/quote]

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