Reply to Raising your kids screen-free (or minimal screens) -- experience from parents with older kids?

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[quote=Anonymous]Unless you are in a very unusual school, a no screens rule will be very socially isolating as they age.  For my son, starting in later ES, it was very common for boys to have “virtual play dates” where they meet up online to play a cooperative game, and also to want to play video games jointly at an in-person play date.  I limit it so that they don’t spend the whole play date on a screen but I realize this also makes our house somewhat less attractive for kids to hang out, which runs contrary to other goals I have.
For my daughter, starting in late elementary, TV shows became a major topic of conversation which was hard for us as I didn’t want her watching those particular shows and it was isolating.  Starting in middle school, the girls pretty much exclusively plan social activities via texting each other or google chat so if your daughter doesn’t have a phone, she is very likely to be shut out of many outings, inside jokes, etc.  it’s aggravating but I can’t remake society.  My teen daughter also uses her phone for certain apps that help her in school—a school one that tracks her assignments, a language one to help her practice her foreign language (especially helpful the year she had an awful teacher), and a math one that is helpful to avoid brain drain over the summer.

My kids have also used their screen tome to collaboratively write short stories or novellas with friends.

I think the goal is to think through what your goals are for Tech, and then use it accordingly. We also put screentime limits on everything but texts to avoid the casual slide into over-usage.   It’s not easy, but I think it’s extremely difficult and ultimately short sighted to just opt out.  It’s also important to balance with other interests.  My kids each do two casual rec sports pretty much year round, have chores around the house, spend hours a day reading, have certain other hobbies (crafts, etc.), and we are a big board game family so there is often a game going almost every evening.  [/quote]

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