Reply to Help! What do you do when a crazy narcissist escalates?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here. Sorry for posting so much on this thread. I don't know if this matters or not but she seems to be focusing all her rage on me and ignoring DH. DH was the one who told her to stop and has declined as many times as I have and used the exact same language as I do each time. She sent the email just to me not both of us. She wrote out in all caps that he is her nephew and she has known him longer than me. Its just bizarre. [/quote]

And yet there you are OP, reading her emails.

If you see an email, delete it. You engage every time you open her correspondence, allow her into your head, and react. You already know if she’s emailing you only personally, it’s not about grandma, so why open it? Stop feeding the drama. You are not declining as much as you’re counting to a toddler looking to get their way and never following though.

She is not the only point of contact for grandmother. Make it clear via your husband you will only go through the other relative, or find a way to contact grandmother on your own.

Who cares if she’s mad /enraged at jut you? Again... disengage. Grey rock. What will she escalate to? If it will hurt your family DOCUMENT AND CONTACT THE POLICE. Yes, it’s bizarre, but you either have to take action, or choose that you are not taking action. “no contact” means you delete her. You don’t read her correspondence. You see it and ignore or delete. 
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