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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]One more thing- maybe another reason why I’m so mad I’m realizing is because the birthday kid is obviously kind of uncool and unlikeable. he’s from a different culture than us and I see him struggling a lot and my heart goes out to him and his mother. I wish my son would take more of an interest in him but i can’t push it too much. I specifically picked out the cards as I thought they would help him fit in more and be a good social currency. So, maybe a punishment surrounding this kid?  Not sure like maybe more play dates? Is that a good idea or mean?[/quote]

Do NOT make a punishment surrounding the kid.  It will completely alienate your son from the kid.  Even worse, think of how the child would feel if it comes out that spending time with him is punishment.

Instead, if you want to foster a friendship, take the kids out to something fun.  Even better, since your heart goes out to the mother, befriend her and together take the kids out for things.  You're hanging out with your friend and the kids are going along.  When I was a kid my mom's best friend had a kid and in addition to spending a lot of time at each others houses, the moms took us to the zoo, the park, puppet shows, etc.  There were also times when we kept each other company while the moms did boring grown-up stuff like shopping for shoes, but if we were good, we could have a treat afterwards.  This way your son is spending time with the kid not because of the kid,  but because of you.  [/quote]

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