Reply to Maternal Instinct Isn’t Real, But the Myth Makes Parenting Harder

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I actually think the maternal instinct is real. I used to have a visceral reaction when my children cried as babies. I wanted to be able to leave them to be handled by someone else sometimes so I could get sleep, but something in me reacted viscerally to their cries.

That doesn’t mean others, especially the father, should not do the fair share of the work. [/quote]

+1. To me the maternal instinct is the need to protect the baby. It doesn’t mean the mother would “instinctively” know how to swaddle or breastfeed, but she would want to learn / do these things as part of her maternal instinct to protect (providing food and comfort is part of protecting).[/quote]

But doesn’t instinct mean that it applies to ALL mothers? What about mothers who kill and abuse their kids. I don’t deny that there is a special kind of love many parent have towards their children but instinct is a reflexive act that applies to all. I don’t think it is the right term or exists. We often hear about an animal mothering instinct .... but what about animals who kill their kids/ leave them soon after birth? Just don’t think instinct is the right term and I do agree that it’s a disservice to use it.[/quote]

This is from Wikipedia - “Instincts are inborn complex patterns of behavior that exist in most members of the species, and should be distinguished from reflexes, which are simple responses of an organism to a specific stimulus, such as the contraction of the pupil in response to bright light or the spasmodic movement of the lower leg when the knee is tapped. The absence of volitional capacity must not be confused with an inability to modify fixed action patterns. For example, people may be able to modify a stimulated fixed action pattern by consciously recognizing the point of its activation and simply stop doing it, whereas animals without a sufficiently strong volitional capacity may not be able to disengage from their fixed action patterns, once activated.[1]”.

What you describe is a reflex - like a new born’s reflex to suck. Instinct is different from reflex.[/quote]

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