Reply to Feeling sad after sister passed and learning of her kindness to others

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here again.  To the poster who said they would not pay for funeral of someome was mean to them:   As I mentioned before, I love her children. They have no money. They need help and would never ask.  I can help them them so they can have a proper and loving service for their Mom. I am so sad,  but it is the right thing to do..  They need me and I want to do this for them.[/quote]

OP you are getting defensive. It is OK to feel sad your sister was unkind to you. Paying for part of the funeral was your choice. The "right thing to do" is subjective in these murky cases and it is rigid to assume there is a rule book about how you do things for a sibling who was cruel;.  You always have choices. You chose to do that. It seems like you are particular about how people respond to you here. I would have to look again, but nobody is judging you for being sad, but they have a right to say I wouldn't have done this or that. It's lovely you are there for her kids and you love them. It is OK to admit even to them that your relationship with their mom was not what you had wanted, but you love them dearly. Everyone knows people are complicated.[/quote]

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