Reply to Talk to me about full time working mom & part time working dad

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[quote=Anonymous]OP, it's unclear how old your child is or how long this dynamic has been going on, but I'm willing to bet that these feelings will fade over time and with some perspective.  You FEEL as though you are missing out on all of these amazing moments and bonding opportunities, but the reality is that those moment are likely fewer than you realize.  They are interspersed with lots of other moments between your DH and child that aren't as great.  So, one way to look at it is that you get to miss out on the not-so-fun moments, too.

Also, as your child gets older, you may realize that your fears of being left out are unfounded and ultimately won't impact the relationship you have with your child. My DH is the default parent and I am the breadwinner. I work long hours and travel, so there are many times when I do not see my kids for a few days.   I felt similarly when our first DC was born.  I felt like like DS and DH had a strong bond and that I was missing out on all of these fun and momentous things.  At times I felt expendable, like they'd be totally fine without me (which they would be, but I wanted to feel needed in that way).

Fast forward 6 years and one more kid, and I don't have a shred of those feelings left.  DH is close with both of our kids and I wouldn't want it any other way.  I am close with both of my kids, too. My 6yo and I have a special bond that is different but just as strong as the bond he has with DH.  Same for my relationship with my 4yo.  I make sure to spend solo time with each kid and we have our special routines and favorite activities.

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