Reply to How to get DH to make peace with his sibling who has terminal cancer?

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[quote=Anonymous]I was in a similar situation, although minus the terminal cancer.   I maintained my independent relationship with my BIL, because I don't let my DH tell me who I can and cannot be friends with.  Eventually their mother was able to get them together under the guise of discussion family estate issues.  But they had to let a few years go past for things to calm down.  I disagree with people saying to drop the issue - you can't force them together, but I certainly would not hold back telling my DH that I disapproved of what he was doing.  This is assuming that it was a "normal" estrangement and no abuse or stealing involved; just disagreement.

And, I practice what I preach, too. I recently made up with an estranged sibling because I wasn't willing to let it get in the way of family stuff.

None of this is to say that estrangements are wrong -- I very much believe that estrangement is the right choice, sometimes.  But from what OP wrote, it sounds more like there are unresolved childhood issues and stubborness involved, not something that was thought through carefully.  [/quote]

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