Reply to accepting that sister doesn't like me and we will never be a "family"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, you've got a lot of unrealistic expectations here.  Your sister *was* busy this weekend - she apparently had plans with neighbors.  Of course you weren't invited - they have a group of friends, and you aren't automatically in it because you are related to the group.  You admit you aren't close, you haven't been close, you don't have much, if anything in common, and you don't really like each other.  Given all that, why on earth would you expect to be included when she is getting together with her friends?

Moreover, if she works 60 hours a week, she's got limited time to do errands, etc., on the weekends.  Based on your description of your relationship, why would you think she would prioritize you?

Finally, if you are getting your idea of how a family should act from TV shows, that says a lot about your connection with reality.  [/quote]

OP here. She always has plans with the neighbors. Not really plans, they are just always together. It wasn't a special thing. They see the neighbor kids many, many times a week. I was trying to get the cousins together for a couple hours on weekend. I said anytime, really. She said she had plans at her work. I offered many options and times, and she said no. Next thing I know she is sending loads of photos of them playing with the neighbors. We live 35 minutes away. It hurts to not have been included. [b]My kids could have easily joined in. 
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I'm not asking to be a priority. We are far from that. I was just thinking we'd see each other more than birthdays and Christmas. It would be nice to be considered as someone to spend time with. not prioritized. [/quote]

Here’s the flip side, OP. We have neighbors like this. Their IL’s and kids are always joining us for block parties and such. I don’t know them well, and when we are having a BLOCK PARTY (you know, for those who live ON THE BLOCK), why are your IL’s here??  I would be annoyed if I was your sisters neighbors and you were showing up with your kids to join in.  They have a dynamic that they obviously love and are comfortable with.  You can’t just crash that to fulfill your fantasy of family. [/quote]

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