Reply to Former stepdaughter wants a relationship

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Reply to "Former stepdaughter wants a relationship"

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[quote=Anonymous]You're the adult, OP.  This young woman was a teenager when you married her father and then he died when she was in her early 20s.  That is a lot to handle.

Don't get me wrong - I understand the resentment and wanting her out of your life.  I had a similar situation with my own step-father and step-siblings before, during, and after the death of my mother.  They were awful to all of us, including while my mother was on her deathbed.  I was 22 and was left to pick up the pieces after she died. Several years later, one of my step-siblings reached out to me.  I was very suspicious but I responded.  He apologized for how awful he was and credited my deceased mother with helping him get his life on track. It was nice to hear - for my own sake and on behalf of my mom.  We didn't maintain contact after that exchange. I don't hold a grudge, but I'm also never going to want a relationship with any of them. I have forgiven but I haven't forgotten.

I responded to the initial outreach because I was - and still am - the bigger person when it comes to them.  Our lives will always be linked to some degree, and I chose to respond with grace.

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