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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Thanks all (except the obviously male troll who I'm sure has no children). He is helpful, and does a lot FOR the baby, he is just mentally checked out. Doesn't really seem interested in bigger picture baby stuff, eg her persistent eating issues. I feel like all of the worry and responsibility falls on my shoulders while he just checks the box of "I changed 6 diapers today so I did my part, now I can go back to twitter". He is also a workaholic so that doesn't help. Ironically he was the one who was much more excited and ready to have kids and always talked about wanting three or four. Now we are one and done. I think at the end of the day he just has some selfish tendencies and is shell shocked- he just didn't understand quite how hard it would be. I was very, very nervous about motherhood and so my expectations were so low I've been pleasantly surprised. He is trying, I'm just so worried it will never click for him and he'll be one of those men who ignores their kid it's whole life.[/quote]

It really can get better, I know these  4 months have seemed like a lifetime but I’m only at 15 months and even now I can say 4 months seems like eons ago and a different LIFE. So much more emotionally draining, all the things. I’m sure a more experienced parent than I could say this even further. Not at all saying you should have a second if your partner continues this way, but there is just no way to know at 4 months. So so much changes each month from here on out. I know plenty of people that were like HECK no to another for the first 6 months, even three years. You are in the thick of it. It’s so great that your transition has been a good one, but your husbands is tougher. Honestly I was the one that struggled more and my DH held me up while I walked through the motions and now at 15 months I’m thriving, kid is thriving etc. and my heart could burst just thinking of him right now. I just encourage you to look at this time as temporary for now, try your best to have empathy for your husband because that’s the best thing for your relationship right now and know that for some the clouds do part. Hopefully they will for your husband.  [/quote]

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