Reply to what do you do when the children know about the affair and are upset about a reconciliation?

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Reply to "what do you do when the children know about the affair and are upset about a reconciliation?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]How old is she?

I really hope you’re getting her therapy for this. You’re modeling the worst type of behavior. Plus, wanting her to get over it truly shows you AND your husband have zero regard for her.

Ugh. You’re complicit in completely screwing up your kids. Hope the DH is worth it! At least when he does it again, the DDs will be out of the house, so there’ll be no one to tell you. What a relief, right?![/quote]

OP.  I say this with all sincerity.  I'm sorry for the pain you have experienced that makes you so unforgiving.

I'm not sure what to say - both parents have regard for her feelings, it's heart wrenching to see her in pain.  But does the other DD who wants to forgive him not have any weight in this at all?  She would be in just as much pain for our family to just write him out of our lives - and wouldn't that screw her up?  Again, being sincere - what is the answer that I should be doing to NOT screw up either kid?[/quote]

Note: I never said you absolutely never should get back together with him.

It’s your attitude towards your daughters that I find shocking! You’re setting up BOTH daughters for so much confusion and pain. The one who wants to follow your lead and smile and have her father back is going to have just as many issues as the one who’s is outwardly lashing out. The tone of your posts imply that you think this is something that’s ONLY about your relationship to your husband. He broke his daughter’s trust in a much much worse way than he broke yours. Any reconciliation has to start from that premise. Anything else, IS terrible parenting.

Open your eyes OP! How do you not get that????[/quote]

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