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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Why are you so hesitant to say that he has a disability? It’s not shameful. Please use the word and talk to her about all kinds of disabilities. Parents who avoid this are really annoying — like parents who pretend we are all the same race.[/quote]

OP here: because from what she's told me, I'd put money on Larlo being autistic and a lot of the autistic adults I know don't like being called disabled. We talk a fair bit about disabilities without using the word -- her dad used a variety of mobility aids for a while, so we are used to that and talk about how everyone's body is different and different people use different tools to do things.

Anyway, thank you for the input, everyone. I want her to be kind and inclusive, but I don't want to speculate inappropriately about Larlo's needs and I definitely don't want to give her the idea that there's something "weird" about Larlo even if she's noticed ways in which Larlo's behavior and circumstances are different from hers. I figured you all would be the right ones to ask![/quote]

Thank you for being sensitive, OP. Definitely do not use the word disabled. I have a child in late elementary and no one uses this word even for the children with obvious physical disabilities. Our child's grade has numerous kids with different types of special needs but it is wholly accepting of everyone's differences. FWIW, the kids that cause the biggest disruptions like running away or having a meltdown are "NT" with no diagnoses or no 504 plans or IEPs. I know several of these parents and I know they would be offended if you knew you spoke to your child about their child being disabled. I don't think there should be a stigma around that word or with having a diagnosis but there is.[/quote]

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