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[quote=Anonymous]OP, your coworker touched a nerve which is why you're posting. If this arrangement was truly tenable to you, you would have brushed it off and moved on. Since you'd ask, I'd say that all of us respond better when the people around us are happy. I don't mean the "I get what I want when I want" type of happiness, but the truly content kind of happiness, where you know you are with people you love and who love you, where you have meaningful work to do, where you feel valued, like the people in your life view you as the best wife, mom, storyteller, bus driver... whatever. We've all been around people who are low level unpleasant until they find the right partner, the right job, the right house, the right hobby. If it were me, I'd sit down with the husband and talk about truly reconciling. If the answer is "no" I would look for other arrangements. I wouldn't skulk around looking for sex which is what everybody in these arrangements does even if they won't admit it. See the guy who posted about he and his wife having four kids and how unhappy he is, even though he admits to having girlfriends. Your children don't need to see you with another man, though all healthy adults need adult emotional and physical interaction... i.e. nobody wants to die alone without a loving partner nearby. Kids don't live in a vacume and notice when something isn't right, even if they can't explain it.  [/quote]

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