Reply to Do you feel guilty for not visiting the gravesites of your loved ones?

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[quote=Anonymous]My mom passed away last fall. She had been displaced from her home after a natural disaster, and had relocated to another state with her husband, who I have a very strained relationship with.

I had gone to visit her immediately prior to her unexpected death.

She lived in the deep south, with my sister and I being here up north (but my sister and I live about 5-6 hours apart).

My mom's husband was arranging the funeral, and my sister was unable to attend due to money and some other personal situations involving her kids. I decided to skip the funeral/burial, and traveled to my sister, who lives in the same city/state where my mom grew up. We had our own memorial service, which was quite lovely. Afterward, we took some of the flowers to my mom's parents' nearby gravesites.

I don't do open caskets, and felt fine not attending my mom's open casket funeral and burial. I needed to be with my sister, and it was nice to have a memorial service in a place where my mom spent most of her life, giving folks the opportunity to attend.

I imagine I'll visit my mom's gravesite some day, but it's in a town I've never been to, and have no other reason to visit -- so it would be a long trip solely to visit her gravesite.

I guess, in short, the physical location where her body is buried isn't very significant to me. She's no longer in that body.[/quote]

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