Reply to How to announce a pet to disapproving parents?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, respectfully, I wonder of you need some sort of therapy to be able to dismiss their opinion as irrelevant.  Who cares what they think? So what if they disapprove?[/quote]

New poster. Agree that there is a larger issue here for you, OP. After the holidays consider some therapy (doesn't have to be forever) to see if you can get better perspective on your fear (reluctance, avoidance, whatever you want to call it) re: your parents. The upbringing you describe does warrant getting some professional third party perspective even if you feel you've "overcome" your upbringing. The fact you have spent a year hiding something as totally mundane as a pet from your parents is a red flag that their approval or disapproval still loom too large in your adult mind. As your kids get older, what will you feel you can't tell your parents about? If one kid wants to study subjects of which your parents disapprove, do you lie about what the kids do at school? If you parents disapprove of an activity the kids do, do you pretend your kid doesn't dance or play soccer or whatever? I'd get therapy about this now, before you're stressing about covering up more significant things than a pet.

Regarding the immediate question, as a PP said earlier: Tell them and have a specific distraction ready: "Tell me how uncle X is doing--did he finish that shed" or whatever. Have several of these specific questions ready to change the topic. Do NOT engage if they criticize and do not try to defend your choice. Leave it at, "I'm sorry you feel that way" and move on or finish the call: "I can only talk another minute--we're leaving to do XYZ" or whatever.

I would not want them talking to the kids on the phone in case they try to badmouth the dog to the kids or they grill the kids. If the kids chat to them do that first then you talk and briefly mention the dog.

And be grateful that you and the parents live in different countries and they can't drop by.
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